Empathy. So Powerful But Often Misunderstood

We all know showing empathy is an important part of building effective relationships, right?  We’ve also all heard empathy is not the same as sympathy. Most of us even know it is a better interpersonal communication choice than sympathy.  But do we really know what empathy is, how to extend it, and perhaps more importantly…

Can’t Agree? 3 Tips to Turn Conflict Into Opportunity

One of my long-time mediation clients loves to argue and tease me about “just wanting everyone to agree about everything.” He usually begins the good-natured ribbing right about the time I offer-up an “Is it possible…” or “What if…” question, which is of course geared toward eventually reaching agreement. This client absolutely enjoys a hearty…

One Bad Attitude Could Spoil The Whole Bunch

This is a true story about a bright, ambitious, twenty-three-year-old who started showing up to work every day with a bad attitude.  She’d sigh big, heavy sighs of exasperation, and wouldn’t speak to her coworkers – except the ones who would listen to her complain during lunch hour.  If she didn’t absolutely have to, this…

Mediation: Happy Ending or Sad Result?

“You know it was a good mediation if everyone leaves unhappy and you ended up settling somewhere in the middle.”  I’ve heard that sentiment often. In fact, I know colleagues who use it as part of their opening remarks during mediation. Sound good to you?  I hope not. I completely disagree with that sentiment.  As…

Self-Development: You’ll Be Glad You Did

Recently, I had a terrific discussion with a successful, respected, high-ranking organizational leader with the Department of Interior.  We were talking about his recipe for success, and what he looks for when considering the potential of others. A passion for self development made his list of top-three characteristics, when assessing an individual’s capacity for success…

Two Tips To Shift From Negative To Positive

Do you ever get negative and just wallow in it?  I’m talking about sitting in that space where it feels like everything and everyone pretty much sucks? Even you. I’m too tired. That’s not fair. She’s an idiot. They don’t like me. It’s your fault. This is too hard. That’s all wrong. It’s too hot….

Rage Building? These 5 Steps Will Calm You Down

Have you ever gotten angry at home? Me too! Rage Builds from time to time – even in conflict resolution specialists. Although I rarely experience external conflict, I am human and I have my moments! Here’s a recent example from my world: I’ve been ready to get rid of the circa 2000, bigger than two…

Shark or Turtle? What is your conflict style?

Can a turtle safely co-exist with a shark? What about a fox with a teddy bear? I say “Absolutely!” If they are aware of their own go-to conflict style, have a decent understanding of those around them, and realize they have options.  When it comes to conflict style, we all have dominate traits, but we…

Two Executives And A Workplace Mediator Walk Into A Bar

OK, so it wasn’t really a bar. It was a nice meeting room, but it felt a lot like a bar-room-brawl.  There was finger pointing, turf battling, name calling, accusation throwing, “I dare you to cross this line” taunting, yelling, and even tears. It was two executives and a workplace mediator, spending a day together…

Results focused or People focused leadership: Which is best?

Over the years, I have noticed leaders – whether just stepping into their roles or seasoned veterans- tend to identify themselves as results focused or people focused. However, what I have learned, witnessed, and experienced, is that to be a great leader one must possess a balance of both results focused and people focused leadership skills….

Healthy Work Environment Tip of the Week

Last week we posted about how using nonviolent communication in the workplace can help create a healthy work environment. One tip we offered was to ditch your judgments and focus on objectively observing the instant situation. In other words, be present for what really is.  But how do we do that? Before we give you the…

Creating Synergy at Work

Having trouble creating synergy at your workplace? I hate to break this to you, but it might just be YOU. Many of us don’t take the time to consider how we communicate when conflict arises. Unfortunately, most of us have been trained to speak a language that encourages us to alienate ourselves, through our communication…