One of my long-time mediation clients loves to argue and tease me about “just wanting everyone to agree about everything.” He usually begins the good-natured ribbing right about the time I offer-up an “Is it possible…” or “What if…” question, which is of course geared toward eventually reaching agreement. This client absolutely enjoys a hearty…
I love it when my clients share break-through moments! I’m talking about realizations and actions that create a shift, releasing them from some of the stress they have been hanging onto unnecessarily. This week one of my most seriously talented clients shared a great one with me! For several months this client had been suffering…
This is a true story about a bright, ambitious, twenty-three-year-old who started showing up to work every day with a bad attitude. She’d sigh big, heavy sighs of exasperation, and wouldn’t speak to her coworkers – except the ones who would listen to her complain during lunch hour. If she didn’t absolutely have to, this…
“You know it was a good mediation if everyone leaves unhappy and you ended up settling somewhere in the middle.” I’ve heard that sentiment often. In fact, I know colleagues who use it as part of their opening remarks during mediation. Sound good to you? I hope not. I completely disagree with that sentiment. As…
Recently, I had a terrific discussion with a successful, respected, high-ranking organizational leader with the Department of Interior. We were talking about his recipe for success, and what he looks for when considering the potential of others. A passion for self development made his list of top-three characteristics, when assessing an individual’s capacity for success…
Have you ever had a boss you considered to be a great leader? I have, twice. Over the years I’ve spent time considering what made them great, as compared to others who ranged from ‘absolutely horrible, have no business having authority over other people” to solidly “good”. Of course, there are several characteristics that differentiate great…
I’ve been thinking a lot about respect, trust, and value this week. I bet, in your own way, you have too. The wake of violence and tragedy leaves us with thoughts we weren’t considering the day before…Even deciding whether to write about my thoughts has been a struggle. I know I don’t have words eloquent…
An executive, whom I greatly admired, once told me “if you aren’t meeting them by June, you will not meet your goals for the entire year.” I took those words to heart and for the next 2 years, with great stress and feelings of inadequacy, I mentally gave up on any goals my organization was…
It’s Memorial Day, 2016. Today many will visit gravesites and attend services to honor our service men and women who served and gave it all, as well as those still with us and even serving today. I hope our veterans and service men and women feel honored today. I hope they feel appreciated by the…
I found myself pondering the impact of change yesterday, while heading home from the last graduation party of the season. I reflected on conversations with graduates, parents, friends and colleagues, about big and small changes, and how they felt as they navigated them. Sometimes strong feelings are fleeting; sometimes they last a lifetime. I…
Have you ever gotten angry at home? Me too! Rage Builds from time to time – even in conflict resolution specialists. Although I rarely experience external conflict, I am human and I have my moments! Here’s a recent example from my world: I’ve been ready to get rid of the circa 2000, bigger than two…
Can a turtle safely co-exist with a shark? What about a fox with a teddy bear? I say “Absolutely!” If they are aware of their own go-to conflict style, have a decent understanding of those around them, and realize they have options. When it comes to conflict style, we all have dominate traits, but we…